i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
