i jhust puked up my retainher.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
