Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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