birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
