I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
this will be a night to untag.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
