It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize