Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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