Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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