never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize
