You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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