Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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