Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
