So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
