I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
