is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
