Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
