Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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