4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
