o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize
