I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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