What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
