First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
