wakey wakey hands off snakey
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
