guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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