Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
