Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
