I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
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