think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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