Your dad touched me again.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize