Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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