Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
