just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
