Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
