Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize