Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize