We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Randomize
