so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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