The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
