everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
