even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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