remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
