The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
