just tell him i said nine months
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
