P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
