i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
