new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize