people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
