I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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