in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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