I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Randomize
