Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Randomize
