i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
