Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize
